Telling My Girlfriend My Deepest Secret

As you may have noticed, we have a new section on the website, and I’m here to add my share to it. Today, I’m going to talk about one of the most intense moments of my life, as you may have experienced: tell my partner.

Telling your significant other that you crossdress is a very important point in everyone’s relationship.

Some think this is but a phase, an insignificant moment in every crossdresser’s life.

Others imagine that it is a life/relationship-defining moment.

The truth is, there’s a little bit of both, but one thing is for sure: it isn’t just a moment, and it requires continuous work.

This was just my personal experience when I told my partner that I like crossdressing.

If you are feeling down because you are anxious about it, keep reading, and maybe you will find not only comfort but also some advice.

Many hard-set cis minds have trouble getting around the idea of different self-perceptions or sexualities.

And that’s not necessarily bad, but it requires work on our part to explain them and enlighten them with a different reality of theirs.

Coming out with my partner was a hard decision, but I’m very glad I did.

I never particularly hid the fact that I loved to go shopping for clothes with her.

She, a cis-female, may have never realized the underlying situation that was going on.

Before the fateful moment when I told her everything, there were some jokes and fooling around with her clothes on my part.

But nothing really serious, just a fun moment for her.

For me was actually more of a test to see how she reacted and if she liked the idea as much as I did.

After four years of dating, I decided that it was time to get it off my chest if we were to move the relationship to the next level.

I was a bag of nerves when I told her to come by my place to tell her. I didn’t blast it out as soon as she came home.

Instead, I set the environment in my favor.

Not only to feel more comfortable with myself but also to let her know that what I was about to reveal to her was no joke.

Dressed in my usual clothes, as I didn’t want to shock her, I put on some quiet tunes and prepared a cup of coffee for us both.

After some hesitation on my part, I decided to come out and tell her how important this side of myself was.

Because we have fooled around before, this didn’t come out as a total surprise for her, of course.

Nonetheless, some were thinking on her part, and she asked some questions.

In a very calm but confused voice, she asked things like “Why?”, “is it something sexual?” and “What exactly does it mean to be a crossdresser?”.

I answered all her questions with full disclosure and told her that I wanted to share this with her, and I was tired of hiding this important aspect of my life from her.

She didn’t quite understand it at the moment, and I have serious doubts that she does now.

But either way, with recurrent talks on the subject, she began to feel more comfortable with the fact that her SO was a crossdresser.

I would love to tell you that she was instantly thrilled with the idea of me in feminine clothes, but sorry, it wasn’t like that.

It took some time and many hours talking about this before she naturalized the facts, and that day was the moment when I felt profoundly relieved that the mutual love had broken through traditional gender norms.

It came with a very simple gesture on her part when, one day, at my place, she asked me if she could borrow some clothes from me.

Three years later, we are still together and love each other very much.

Even though crossdressing isn’t a big part of our relationship, it is a big relief to know that her love is unconditional and accepts me as I am.

And that couldn’t make me happier.

Telling your partner that you love crossdressing is a big defining step in everyone’s relationship.

One that I encourage everyone to take if they feel they are dating the right person.

I believe that it doesn’t matter if you are dating your one and only; the important thing is that you are with someone who loves you as much as you do and wouldn’t do anything to get back at you.

If you respect each other, I think you can come to terms with crossdressing and maybe add some fun to it.

I recommend not to get your hopes too high if you are planning to tell your SO that you crossdress.

Do not expect your partner to love the idea because that depends on many things instantly.

How long have you been dating, how much of it you let through, how you tell her…

With patience and love, you can get through this nerve-wracking moment.

Maybe this story isn’t as fascinating as you would have expected, but it’s an honest and true one.

An example of how one speck of dust in the galaxy told her SO about a well-hidden secret.

I would love to read your personal experience in the comments below.

If you haven’t come out to anyone, it doesn’t matter. You will find the right person(s) and the moment to do so.

I strongly encourage everyone to be honest with the people they are closest to.

Only this way can we get rid of all the prejudices that are ever present today.

If you are thinking about coming out to anyone, maybe this little post will help you gain some insight and ideas. I hope to see you all soon!

Written by Tina Munova.

Learn More：

How do I tell my girlfriend about my secret crossdressing?