Making It Clear That Crossdressing Doesn’t Make You Gay

As soon as you start to dress up as a woman, you may feel some sort of conflict and confusion. Although some of us have clues about what’s happening, it’s still a process of discovery. And as such, many of us have at least caught ourselves thinking of a certain question. Does crossdressing make you gay?

The short answer is that it does not. But how do you explain that to men who hit on you?

What if your wife asked you this question? Well, make it clear that these are two separate things.

The way you like to dress has nothing to do with your sexual orientation.

It’s common to struggle with no explanation. With that in mind, here I have a few tips on how to talk about it.

1. Your identity has more to it than this binary norm

You may start by explaining how your identity is composed of more concepts other than gender and sexuality.

You are who you are, not because of these two little things.

I also want to mention a few other things that help to shape your identity.

A good example is to tell them about your life as a man and how nothing has changed.

It may help them understand that crossdressing has no impact at all on anything else in your life.

Once you do that, follow up with the conversation by stating that your gender identity is a separate thing from your sexual orientation.

People may have a wrongful idea that femininity attracts masculinity and vice-versa.

But this binary norm is outdated and inaccurate.

You can be a feminine man or even dress up as a woman and still be straight.

2. Dressing up is more of a hobby

For some of us, crossdressing is nothing more than a distraction.

It serves us as a means of escaping from our tedious lives as men for a moment.

You may justify it as a harmless hobby, such as any other kind of stuff people do out there.

The important thing to stress out is that you can still be a straight cisgender guy after you’re done with it.

Although it’s not a precise comparison, you may use drag queens as an example.

Many of them are straight guys who dress up as women for entertainment purposes. Learning a few things about make-up and pretending to be a woman for a few hours won’t make you develop a sexual interest in men.

This kind of thought is nothing more than toxic masculinity at its peak. Its limiting properties are harmful, as they prevent you from being who you want to be.

Hence, you should break free from it and try to educate people so they can open their minds.

3. Regarding trans people

Even If you’re a trans woman, you have no obligation at all to like men.

You may identify as a woman 24/7, dress up in public, and even transition with hormones.

But this is just your gender identity and still has zero influence on who you’re attracted to.

I, for example, identify as a woman most of the time, and when I do, I consider myself to be a lesbian, as I still like women.

Some of our sisters do so as well, and others are bi or even asexual.

The point here is that people have several combinations of gender identities and sexual orientations.

This proves that these two concepts are not as interlinked as people tend to assume.

4. Why do men hit on you

So, if crossdressing doesn’t make you feel attracted to men, why do so many of them hit on you?

Why do they expect crossdressing men to be gay and trans women to be into them?

Well, part of them is the same reason why we are so conflicted at first.

Society still leans towards the centuries-old cis-hetero normativeness.

And as such, especially in Western countries, this kind of view is imposed on us.

So it’s not that hard for them to associate any expression of femininity with signs of us being into them.

With that in mind, some others may just be into women with certain masculine parts and can’t help with be total creeps.

Nonetheless, we can say that most of these misinterpretations are society’s fault as a whole.

Repressing information about gender identity creates taboos.

All that while reinforcing made-up norms makes things harder to understand.

We grow with people expecting us to be something that we may not identify as and to fit in with concepts we didn’t even choose.

And so do these people who inadvertently hit on us.

Not differentiating concepts of gender and sexuality may cause people to think crossdressers are gay.

But this is not the case, and many of our sisters prefer women over men.

It may be difficult to explain that to other people, but you can always try a few different approaches.

As long as you make it clear that your gender identity is not tied to your sexual orientation, you’re helping to put an end to misinformation.

Do you know about any other way of explaining this to people?

Make sure you tell us in the comments about how you educate people close to you on that matter.

Learn More:

Are All Cross Dressers Gay? Transgender? Is It A Sexual Fetish?

Do you consider crossdressers to be part of the LGBT community?

Quiz:

Why do you think that people still see sexuality and gender as a blurred line?

A. They Just tend to associate femininity with “Liking men.”


B. They cant differentiate crossdressers from straight women


C. Not talking about taboos may cause society to have misconceptions about gender roles.

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